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The Far Country

by Eliotwilder1

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1.
It's the end of the season All the shudders have been nailed We're folding the cabanas All the big boats they have sailed And I'm left here to ponder Over the wild blue yonder All the beaches are deserted The roller coaster does not roll The concessions are abandoned And umbrella stuck in the shoal And I'm left here to ponder Over the wild blue yonder Putting out the last of the garbage Sam says, "I'll see you next year" I'm about to say, "I won't be back" But Sam went to get a beer And I'm left here to ponder Over the wild blue yonder
2.
Dark Wood 05:06
From out of nowhere There came a storm A torrent of darkness that blacked my soul It felt like nothing I'd ever known Or could describe Let alone control In the middle of the journey of my life I found myself in a dark wood For I had lost the right path Rough, stubborn, and wild From out of nowhere A drizzle of horror Manifested as a queasy physical pain Thought that it might pass But it went on and on Until it consumed my brain From out of nowhere There came a panic My thoughts a tornado in my head I could not understand it Couldn't stop it So ugly and so widespread
3.
Release Me 04:50
I been a prisoner here Been here for a million years Could be here for a million more Open up the gate before it's too late Won't someone help me knock down the door Is anybody out there Does anybody have the key Won't somebody come along and set me free Won't you release me I’m down on my knees Won't you release me Please, please, please I want to let it all go, I want to give it all up But I guess I just don't have the guts I want to be strong, don't care if I'm wrong No ifs, no ands, and no buts Wouldn't hurt you to help me In fact I would do more than ask You might like to if you are up to the task Won't you release me From this troubled place Won't you release me And send me to a state of grace I want to hang it all up I want to pack it all in The question is why haven't I I want to say, See ya I want to say farewell I want to kiss you all goodbye You could make it easier If you'd pitch right on in Plan a little send off Best to leave you with a grin
4.
My Problem 04:36
I made a lot of goofs I hit a lot of snags I screwed my shit up royally I blew my chances Of ever finding love Yeah that's the story of me That’s the story But the thing that bugs me most The thing that hurts down to the bone Is that thing that's doomed me from the start I’ve wracked my brain the best I could But I never understood I never understood my own heart I done a lot of bad I caused a lot of pain And I did it mostly unwittingly My whole life is joke Just not funny ha-ha And I have suffered befittingly I made a big mess I didn’t clean it up And now it’s coming back to haunt me I have paid the price Paid it back with interest So why do my failures still taunt me
5.
Define Love 05:44
What is this, I say This is this, you say Then it’s goes and fades away Into the oblivion of lost dreams I have a void Inside my wretched guts And it spills over And it busts out at the seams If you ask me It is truth It is beauty It is truth and beauty That is love What I see is this What you see is that And I just want to build a bridge That spans our divide Maybe we can connect Maybe we can share our secrets Maybe then we won't have to hide What I want is this What you need is that But what happens to us When you pull off the veil You got one naked boy And one naked girl Ravaging each other Hear them wail
6.
I can recall when I first fell so hard You looked right through me And I swooned There was something clear In your soft green eyes You disarmed me And the walls fell I will walk you out of the desert, you said And I believed you 'Cause I so wanted to believe I will take you by the hand, you said I held out my hand And you pulled away I will live to see you die, I will live to see you die An eye for an eye, an eye for an eye I will live to see you die I can recall when it first took shape Like camera lens coming to focus And I rushed to meet the tide And it bowled me right over I was just fool enough let you in I let you take over And you ran the joint right into the ground Tossed in a match And set the world on fire And we dance among the ruins And we dance among the ruins And we drink and we die laughing It would be easy to be angry Because the anger kills the love And love is fragile And anger devours it like a raging beast I don’t want what we have to come to ruin And wind up alone out in the desert I just want to feel love I just want to feel your love
7.
Late last night I changed my mind Decided I would pack it in I stashed my dreams and my busted heart My hopes that I would ever win Well I hit the road in my beat-up van Had to get myself right out of town Said farewell to my sleeping kid No, I just didn't want to bring her down Say goodbye, bye to all I've known Say hello to the far country I know that I, I am all alone Way out here in the far country I drove along 'bout a thousand miles Till my van went and blew a rod The mechanic said it'd cost a thousand bucks I took the name in vain of my god So I hitched a ride with a guy named Fred Said he was headed to a cult out West He wanted to know if I would go along Told him I would join him on his quest Fred and I we found a home With seventy virgins at our beck and call We built an empire with our own four hands Next week we break ground for a mall
8.
Let me tell you all Just what I’ve seen What I been witness to unwittingly It ain’t pretty It is downright base But it all happened unremittingly I wish I did not see But I can’t change reality Here they come Like a juggernaut They are blowing around like autumn leaves They’ll eat you out Of your house and home Watch them close they are as thick as thieves Say what you will But you can’t know What it’s like to live among this tribe They stew in their filth They are not contrite As for the rest I’m at pains to describe Suffice to say they're vile And they’re here to stay for long, long while Don't you equivocate Better do something before it's too late Don’t turn a blind eye Don’t let these sleeping dogs lie You can judge me Call me scum But you’ve got no idea where I’m coming from I have lived it I’ve seen it all first hand They play the game of zero sum I’m soon to be replaced Thrown out like toxic waste
9.
My Psychosis 06:14
This didn’t turn out Quite the way I thought it would This is not the life I was hoping for What I was hoping for Was something a little bit better Something grander, something more I think about the time I was on that stretch of highway And my car got run off the road It was then and there everything changed It was then and there I saw my life explode This is me, this is who I am, this is how I feel This is my story, this is my world and none of it is real Sometimes I imagine I slipped through a crack Into an alternate dimension Things were the sort of the same and sort of not It was a place outside my comprehension And in this place things seemed slightly off In a way almost imperceptible And I didn’t get it at first, didn’t see the change It just became what was acceptable What is it like to be in my head What is it like to feel what I feel I could draw you a graphic novel But to you it would never seem real Time goes by in the way time goes by And I grew up and grew older And the love of my life she got away from me And the world got a lot colder And I came to realize just what had happened I had broken through by osmosis You can say I’m crazy You can say I’m nuts You can say it’s my psychosis
10.
Home 05:22
Got my things all packed away Turned off the radio Took one last look around And told myself I'm ready to go I was born a long, long way From where I'm wanna be And now I'm, I'm on my way I'm on my back way home Got my ticket in my hand The train is almost here A wind blows my at my back My eyes let go a tear Scenes go floating by Like something from a dream And I let go a laugh This is not just what it seems

about

When you gaze for long into the abyss, Nietzsche says, the abyss also gazes into you.

credits

released March 6, 2024

Thanks to Dave Westner for playing bass on these songs.

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Eliotwilder1 Boston, Massachusetts

With the exception of the albums "Wolves," "The Far Country," and "Mercy," these songs were recorded in Boston at Woolly Mammoth Sound between 2004 and 2009. Big thanks to Dave Westner and Natalia Cooper.

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